In the Eyes of an Angel
by Trace of Late
Summary: Nash's thoughts on what he did and why he did it after he destroys the airship. A little language, and violent themes for the rating. Mechanics fixed.


In the Eyes of an Angel  
  
Standard Disclaimer - I don't own Nash or any of the other characters of Lunar, or places, or idea, blah blah... oh yeah, I don't intend to make a profit of this either. So please don't sue me. e.e;  
  
AN: This takes place right after Nash destroyed the airship engine. It's his thoughts and feelings on what he did and why he did it.  
  
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Of all the things I've ever been called in my life - pessemistic, egotistical, a jerk, annoying - never once has the word 'traitor' ever entered the equation. Yet now I'm exactly that: a traitor. And there isn't a damn thing I can do to change that fact now.  
  
I'm not stupid. I know what kind of power Ghaleon has at his disposal. I -know- what kinds of things he could do to people if he wanted to... and they were horrible. And I also know that if he ever snapped off his rocker that he just might do those things. He might torture innocent people. And while he certainly wasn't crazy - mind, he was completely the opposite - he was blinded by emotions more than he cared to admit. Not that I speak to him, that is. I'm just his errand boy now, here in the Grindery.  
  
I could be out there, with Alex and Kyle and Jessica and Nall. And Mia. I could be out there, adventuring with them all, trying to save this damned world and give my life some meaning. But for all my intelligence, I know better than to go against the awesome power that is Ghaleon. Which is why I'm saving them all from a fate worse than death.  
  
Immediately, I knew that I couldn't let Mia just walk into her own death.... a pit of doom and despair that she would perish in, lonely and afraid. I love her too much to let her do that to herself. But when I tried to tell her that she was just going to get herself killed, she smiled at me. She -smiled-. And in her eyes, she gave me a look of determination and of hope, balancing out the happiness on her face. In the darkest of hours, she was acting like she had just learned a new spell - content and proud. Looking into those pure eyes of hers, I wondered if maybe I was the only sane being left on this planet of ours. I was the only one smart enough of such strong willed people to understand that the cause they thought they were fighting for was useless.  
  
But those eyes....  
  
They were something else. I felt like I was drowning in the eyes of an angel.  
  
I knew what I had to do. I couldn't just let someone who had so much to offer to the world disperse from it in a futile battle. So I destroyed the airship. For Mia. If I hadn't, she surely would have flown to the Frontier and attempted to slay Ghaleon in what would have been a pitiful demise, and of all people, Mia Ausa did not deserve that.  
  
And while I told myself that I was doing this for Mia, so that she could live... some small part of me whispered that maybe I wasn't doing it -just- for her.  
  
Althena help me, I actually did it for those other dolts, too.  
  
Althena help me, I actually cared.  
  
At first I figured it was a.... a... leech complex, or something. For lack of better company for the stretch of time we'd traveled together, I had gotten to know them by accident. But when I thought about it, and visualized it, it almost tore me apart. Seeing them all, lying on the ground in pools of their own blood, with Ghaleon smiling triumphantly above them... It was really hard to bear. And these were some of the first people I could classify as real 'friends'. At the Guild I'd had aquantinces, but not much else... I was too busy aiding Ghaleon, too busy studying new spells.  
  
So I had to do this. For those stupid fools that thought they might actually have a chance against the terror that Ghaleon would reign down on them like a hail of arrows. Death's cold messanger would be the one person I looked up to, and I couldn't let that happen. So I destroyed the airship, because a pair of angel eyes made me realize that the people you care about are worth everything to you.  
  
I was going to be the hero now. Their goals were unrealistic, but mine... mine would save their lives. I was doing them a favor.  
  
I was saving their lives. I was doing what was right....  
  
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AN: So, what do you think? It's just a short little one shot of why Nash might have done what he did. I'm not a huge fan of Nash, but he does have some of the most character developement in the game. I'm thinking of doing a few more of these first person character fics from Lunar1. Let me know what you think! 


End file.
